Celebrating All the Tiny Wins
This is HARD. I am frequently overwhelmed, stuck, and feel incapable. However I am celebrating the “tiny wins” that I manage, whenever they occur. It seems silly, and it helps me to remember that I lived on my own, responsible for EVERYTHING in my life, for many years. And I can do it again. Bills – I have found most of the login information I need to continue to pay our bills on time. I never really thought about the…
One step closer, but no easier
The death certificate adventures continue. At last update I was in a Catch-22 because the Basha’s middle name was not spelled out on our marriage license. The Mexican government would not accept a middle initial, even if it matches the name. At that point, I channeled the Basha and decided that “the appropriate application of cash” was the best way to solve this conundrum. I hired a lawyer. The lawyer is Mexican, knows how Mexican law and the government work,…
My well-being is a house of cards
It has been 74 days since the Basha died. My brain seems to be coming back. I am remembering the Spanish that I’d learned. My phone and the computer aren’t as incomprehensible as they were before. I’ve even cooked for myself (a few times). I have been getting out and socializing with friends. I smile. I laugh. Sometimes I feel almost normal. Then, something out-of-the-blue will hit me and I’ll be falling all over again. Grief overwhelms me. I feel…
30March chilaquiles – Green & Rosse
This was another friend recommendation – and very good! It is located on A. Obregon and looks out over the Malecón. The location is both amazing and expen$ive. The chilaquiles, while delicious were about 50% more expensive than any of the other places I’ve tried. That said, the chips were crispy and cut to be bite-sized! Very helpful with a saucy dish like this. The sauce was a mildly spicy chipotle salsa, and it was served with 2 POACHED eggs,…
23March chilaquiles – Ocean Café & a surprise
On the recommendation of a friend, I went to Ocean Café on Agustin Arriola this morning for the “Chilaquiles Quest”. I was a little later than usual leaving today, but it turned out to be for the best. The classic car club had a first day of spring parade along the Malecón today. The one that got me to stop and pay attention was the Mystery Machine. All the owners/drivers were so happy to have people taking pictures of their…
Sunday – not-so-funday
Since the Basha died, Sundays are really hard for me. It had been our 15+ year tradition that Sundays were for jazz, mimosas, and brunch. Sometimes we went out (more when we were back in the States), but over the last 4 years, he made bacon, and I made GF, sourdough, blueberry pancakes. YUM!! Since his death, the habits of Sundays have disappeared. The day becomes chaotic and sad. My answer for this dilemma (for now) is that Sunday is…
Registro Civil and a Catch-22
It took 3 weeks for me to gather all the needed documents for the Registro Civil (equivalent to the County Clerk’s office). On 11Feb (23 days since the Basha’s death) with the documents (birth certificates and marriage license) and the CERTIFIED translations of all of them. They reviewed the documents and told me that all of the documents had to apostilled (certified as legitimate in the US) before they could be accepted. This is a problem. A good friend talked…
Death in a Foreign Language – Day 2
The Basha died on a Sunday. So the following day, Monday, my friends and I met Eva from the funeral home at the government buildings to wade through the paperwork. I was numb, and had forgotten virtually all the Spanish I’d ever learned, so having friends to guide me, and translate for me, was necessary and amazing. We went to the first office, and were told by the receptionist to leave our documents (birth certificates, marriage license) and go to…
Death in a foreign language – Day 1
A.K.A. Bureaucracy BLOWS Government paperwork is horrible, no matter how you look at it. In another language, the paperwork, processes, and expectations take on GARGANTUAN proportions. Unlike any deaths that I have been touched by in the United States, the Mexican process *could* be considered swift and organized. However as the person who has just lost the love of their life, and can barely speak English through the grief, it was a nightmare-ish vortex. Thank goodness for the friends, community,…
Restarting My Life
When I decided to start a blog I had big ideas. As time wore on my ideas became smaller and life took over so I rarely posted. I am now in a place where I have to start over. Square one. Everything I assumed, and took for granted, has changed. The Doctora is restarting her life. January 19th my world disintegrated. The love of my life, my soul-mate, my best friend, and my lover, died. The Basha has left the…